Tread lightly: asking questions that will help, not make it worse

I turned forty last year which apparently means that my body is now scheduled to start falling apart. As such, things ache and hurt, but I'm taking it in stride. Literally.

One of the issues I've developed is a problem with my foot, which likely stems from an issue that I had with my knee which was the result of an injury to my hip. Yeah - take me out to the back forty and just shoot me already.

Anyhow, after much resistance I called the doctor's to make an appointment. When I called, I told the receptionist/nurse that I wanted to see my doctor about concerns with my foot.

She asked me "what's wrong with your foot?"

This really irritated me. If I KNEW what was wrong with my foot I wouldn't likely be going to the doctor. It wasn't as simple as saying, well, I dropped an anvil on it - so I believe it may be broken.

What I wanted to say was: "well I did some research of my symptoms on WebMD and I either have a tumour or its Football toe.

What I actually said, "Uhhh...it hurts when I walk". Wow. Could I have sounded more like an idiot.

And this made me thing of how we respond to HR issues - I know we like to throw the ball back in a manager/employee's court by asking them what they think the issue might be, but there needs to be some guidance within these questions.

Asking more pointed questions can get to the real issue and it can also alleviate making the person feel like an idiot...because sometimes you just don't know how to go about explaining what the issue is or where to start.

All you know is that something is wrong.

I see dead people

Wow - all those tongue-in-cheek books and articles about the impending zombie apocalypse...yeah, well they may be onto something.

Seriously.

I took a good look at the people riding this bus yesterday morning and I swear that most of them were dead. I know it was Monday morning, but I honestly spent the ride contemplating my fight or flight options should things go bad.

Top of my priority list for today: Google how to survive a zombie attack on bus.

I also find it interesting that despite the public safety campaigns reminding people to wear sit belts and the amount of time, money, and effort you have to go to when strapping your child into the back of your car (rivaled only by NASA) ...people (myself included) are still willing to pay money to hurtle down a highway while standing in the aisle of a bus, with only a pole to hold on to and a few passengers to potentially break my fall.

I'm starting to doubt that these two ideas area unrelated.

Friday Playlist

So I think I might have mentioned that I'm taking the bus to work now.

I use to take it all the time in high school and university, but after that my commute was either too short or busing not an option. But here I am, back on the system again.

Overall it's been good. It's nice to read or listen to music instead of dealing with the stop/ start of driving, but I do miss the lack of control in my schedule. And I do like driving.

However, this is for the best and I'm trying to determine what the best music to listen to on a bus is...something that I didn't really put too much thought into when I was in the car. So I find myself flipping until I hit one that I can listen to the whole album (and yes, I still call them albums even when they are on my ipod).

So this past week, these are what I settled on :

Fleetwood Mac - Rumours
Paramore - Brand New Eyes
Kings of Leon - Only By the Night
Adele - 21
The B-52s - The B-52s

I would be really interested and/or happy to receive any recommendations. I will listen to pretty much anything. Except country.

Have a good weekend.

Conference confidential

Can can I be honest about something - I am really sick of hearing about HR Conferences.

I never really "got" the appeal of conferences - they just seem so..so..like watching an episode of Glee, without anyone breaking out in song (well, at least not pre-cocktail hour). Dramatic life lessons crammed into small sessions, multiple people vying to be the lead singer, and lots of innuendo and sarcasm filler.

If the many Twitter feeds I've followed are any indication, it's pretty much a clique-y drink-fest.

But, I'm fully willing to admit that perhaps I haven't gone to the right conference, or gone with the right people, and quite possibly not gone with the right attitude. Any of these or a combination of any of these may be true.

However, when I sit back and think about what I would be getting out of a conference (and unless you are a presenter), it is about what you will get out of it...I'm not sure whether the value is there.

And yes I know there's the networking angle, but quite honestly, the idea of meeting like minded people...well, that scares the shit out of me.

HR Re-born

So it's been four weeks since I began my new adventure in HR and things are going really well. I've been meaning to write about it, but one - I've been so busy/tired and two - I was kind of waiting for the shine to wear off.

I'm not going to wax poetic about how this is the best thing I've ever done or that it was "meant to be", but the truth is that I really, truly have not felt this good and positive about a job move. In all respects, this has been a positive experience - the people, the organization, and the job itself. I realize it will have it's challenges and there are a few things that make my eye brow raise a little, but overall - I see so much potential.

I feel good about my decision. And it shows - people have commented on how excited I seem about my work. Excited may seem like an over-statement, but it's not far off from the mark.

I can admit now that I was seriously questioning whether I wanted to remain in HR. I was having a difficult time determining whether this is what I envisioned myself being a part of for the next few years.

Where I was...the answer was no.

Where I am now...absolutely.

I have often been on the other side of the desk of a new employee who is clearly happy with their new role and has the energy to put in not only what needs to be done, but wants to go beyond this and more. I never knew whether to envy them or question their sanity.

I get it know.

Not my usual Sunday thoughts about work

At exactly 4:41 pm this afternoon it hit me.

Holy shit - I start a new job tomorrow. Let the nerves, hives, and gastric upset begin.

Sure I'm excited, but I'm nervous too.

You know what I'm most worried about - the on-boarding. I mean, will it be good or will I be left on my own.

Because you know what? HR deserves good service too.

Last dance people

The day is finally here. Friday.

But not just any Friday - my last Friday with my current employer.

I had a flash back to highschool dances when the opening chords of "Stairway to Heaven" started playing and teens scrambled to find their partner for that last dance. If you were fortunate enough to have gone with someone or had secured a partner earlier in the evening, you were calm and just shuffling it out. If you came alone, didn't do any propecting or were in the girls' bathroom putting on lip gloss and dashed out as soon as you knew it was last call only the arrive minutes after a perky little thing a year younger asked your "intended" to dance ...well then you might have been panicking or seriously pissed off (that bitch).

Regardless, when the song stopped...the dance was over.

So cue the Zepplin. I just fixed my lip gloss and I am ready to dance my way out of here.

'tis the season

In theory I understand the purpose and the benefits of a performance evaluation program.

In practice, it rarely lives up to both the purpose or benefits.

Managers hate doing them (those that actually participate).

Employees think it's all smoke and mirrors.

HR, well we push the hell out of it but we too realize the futility of the process.

You know who some of the worst offenders are when it comes to following through on performance evaluation best practices.

Human Resources.

Something about cobbler's children having no shoes...

Exit Strategy

The countdown is on and I'm in slightly manic mode because for some strange reason I have this feeling like I need to (and will be able) to complete everything that is on my plate before I leave.

As if I could.
As if I should try to.

Is it because I'm such a dedicated employe? Not really.

I believe it's similar to the complusion that makes me "do" my hair before I go to the hair stylists...I mean, I want a hair cut, but I don't want to look like I need a hair cut. It's also related to the same compulsion that makes me have a snack before going out for dinner - I want to eat, but I don't want to look like I need to eat.

So I suppose it's because I want to leave , but I don't want it to seem like I had to leave or that I couldn't do the work.

Talk about managing an exit strategy.

Stepping out

So, I few days back I made some changes - I had actually planned to go a bit further than I did, but hey...baby steps.

I dropped the Corporate Daycare in favour of something a bit more whimsical and reflective of how I'm feeling these days. Besides, after over 5 years as CD...it was time.

I had started to think about dropping the whole anonymous things, but really I do not have the stomach to handle the amount of discomfort that thought caused, but...at the same time I needed to feel more "real".

So, I made a switch both here and on Twitter; however, it just didn't feel like enough.

And then inspiration hit - in the form of new acquaintances and a re-connection of an old one. I am trying to establish some sort of connection, so seeing my silly "BBNB" among all the real people just felt flat.

I mean, BBNB? Seriously, who am I - an American rapper?

So, I went for it and put out my name. Really only my first name, but still...work with me here. I know, the odds of another person who works in HR having the same first name are slim to none, but I'm willing to take the chance.

I'm starting to call it the, "I don't give a fuck 40s" period of my life.

So, there. I have yet another thing in common with Madonna. In addition to putting out a coffee table sex book, we both go by our first names and have a connection with the UK.

I realize that this all sounds like I'm just jumping on a bandwagon, and I suppose I am, but really...what is the point of Twitter?

To follow.